River of Joy

The other day I saw a beautiful sunrise.  A special winter one full of soft muted color.  It reminded me of the conversation I had with my cousin the morning after my husband passed away.  It was early morning and we were watching the sunrise from the dining room window.   I remember how beautiful the colors were.  Much like this past week.   It's amazing how our memories are connected to our senses.

She kindly told me her theory about the river of joy running throughout life.   This river is running parallel to us all our lives.  Even in the midst of great sorrow or anger we can choose to tap into that river of joy.  It's there for us whenever we want to reach for it.

And I have clung to those words this past year.  How comforting to reach for a river of joy when all else is lost.  If even for a mere moment.   We can pass back and forth between tears and laughter if we only just allow the fluidity of our thoughts and emotions to be as they are.   It means we can't edit ourselves as we so often do.

I wonder today if this river of joy is not connected to our souls.  The lifeline for our eternal selves.   A way for us to experience life today as transcendental beings.   A mere hint of what is yet to come.